(Drum roll, please.)
I have a date this Saturday.
And let me tell you… I’m really nervous!
There are lots of reasons for my nerves. I met this guy on Match.com, so this will be the first time we’re meeting “in real life.” A few photos (albeit very cute photos!) and a short bio never tell the complete story. And you’d be surprised what other guys have left out of their bios. (You know, trivial things like multiple children, multiple ex-wives and multiple drug dependencies.) So I worry that he will be different than I’ve envisioned, and even more so that I won’t be what he expects.
Then there’s the wardrobe dilemma. I have no idea what to wear! Should I wear a dress, or does that presume we’re going somewhere fancy? Cocktail attire can appear out of place at McDonalds. And naturally I want to wear black, because every gal looks thinner in black. But I don’t want to look like a gothic funeral attendee, either.
To top it off, I don’t handle dating etiquette very well. Should we hug or shake hands when we meet? Should I offer to pay at the end of the meal? The check juggle is always awkward, but I think it’s rude to just assume he’ll pay. (Even though he should, right ladies?!)
Why is the preparation for this first date suddenly worse than the prep for my now infamous medical procedure?
Recently, I read a chat room post from Harpo, a girl who, while getting ready for a date, was seeking advice on how to calm her ever-increasing nerves.
Sweet_talker told her to blast upbeat, fun music and dance around to a song or two to get her jitters out. Knowing how I dance, I’d probably break a limb and then have to cancel the date.
rockinrobin, NurseMichelle and several others told her to pamper herself with everything from bubble baths to manicures to massages. Not a bad plan, though I don’t recommend any waxing right before the date… if you know what I mean.
techwife recommended getting her mind off the date by chatting with her mom or girlfriends about other things, like shopping or their kids. I can see the wisdom in this. Sitting around and dwelling on an upcoming date only makes me more nervous!
And several people recommended drinking a glass of wine. (Or “taking a shot,” as my innocent friend Christy suggests.) Though, junebug is quick to point out that it should be a “small glass of wine.” As she recalls, “I got picked up for a date by a guy who was so nervous he got hammered before he picked me up. It’s safe to say I did NOT get into the car!”
All this advice got me thinking about what I’m so scared about. My insecurities tell me I’m not the prettiest, smartest or sweetest girl on the block. But really, who is? I still have a lot to offer (or so says my mom). I can quote every episode of Saved by the Bell, I have an unprecedented ability to remember commercial jingles, and I actually understand the rules of most sports. What more could a guy want?
For me, what calms me down most before nerve-racking situations (like Saturday’s date) are God’s promises. Like this one, which I’ve taken from The Message translation because I just love this version.
Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. – Philippians 4:6
God knows my heart. He knows my worth in him. And he knows this guy I’m going out with on Saturday. In that, I find peace. Here’s hoping for a great date!
Our nervous advice seeker, Harpo, later posted about how her date went. She was actually able to calm her nerves a bit using some of the suggested activities! But then, on her way to meet her date for dinner, she was pulled over and got a $170 speeding ticket. Whoops! I don’t think a bubble bath can fix that one!